Tag: meds

19 Steps

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  1. Endure a number of episodes unnoticed
  2. Act out and destroy things/people
  3. Retreat
  4. Avoid everything
  5. Get confronted by family and friends
  6. Get hospitalised
  7. Self assess
  8. Decide you need to see a GP
  9. See a GP, get referred to psychologist
  10. See a psychologist, get referred to psychiatrist
  11. Argue with the psychiatrist, because they’re shit at their job
  12. Get a better psychiatrist who gets you
  13. Do the sessions/take the meds
  14. Eat/sleep/exercise/meditate
  15. Manage your self better, and learn the signs
  16. Build a safety net of family and friends
  17. Get continually better
  18. When an episode is coming, let people know
  19. Repeat

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Meat Suit Mechanics

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If something is wrong with my car, I take it to a mechanic. They have the tools and the knowledge to find out what’s happening, take steps to minimise the damage, get the car running and give me advice on how to avoid the issue in the future..

I once had a mechanic who was brilliant. He could get any car to start, which suited me just fine because I owned a bomb – a real accident-waiting-to-happen kind of car. Anytime there was an odd noise or a failure, this dude would get it started.

Eventually I graduated to a more modern mode of transportation. It had A/C. It had power steering and a radio that worked. It even had a little computer that checked how the engine was running, and made adjustments to things on the fly to keep it going. Sweet!

But the mechanic was lost. This was unknown territory. There were parts he couldn’t see that did things he could only guess at because of the results they produced. And when things went wrong with these invisible parts, he was at a loss. There was nothing for him to look at, no holes to plug, sumps to drain or gaps to weld. All he could do was shake his head.

This is why it’s damned important to have a doc you can trust. One who knows about the hidden computer that drives your meat-suit. One that looks at the results as holistically as possible and doesn’t make snap decisions, or try to plug the wholes with meds. Because when your meat-suit mechanic is dealing with bipolar, it’s not the meat-suit that has the issue – it’s the wet-ware behind it. And that needs a whole different suite of tools.

Working Out

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Neuroplasticity is a wonderful thing. It means that thought patterns are changeable, and brain-parts are programmable.

It means that brain-training works. There’s a growing draft of research that literally shows the brain changing itself in response to new stimulus. Every thought and every action literally shapes your brain. Even the way you think about how you think can train your brain to change.

For me, the key to managing bipolar is knowing when a mental state-change is happening, and preparing to deal with it. Like an athlete training for a grueling event, you can train your brain to become resilient, flexible, tough.

Music, reading, eating, talking, listening, being physically active, thinking, and thinking about thinking are all part of my mental gym. Done right, you can build a brain that’s tough enough to withstand the bad times, and agile enough to think through rash decisions before a compulsion becomes an act.

But just like a gym session, it takes commitment. This isn’t something you can sign up to at the start of the year and quit after a month. This is for life.

Working out your brain is far tougher than any New Years resolution. Quitting smoking? Losing weight? Climbing Everest? Easy.

But it’s also ten- no a hundred- no FIVE MILLION TIMES as rewarding. Because you have a chance of building a mind that works the way you want it to, and you get to enjoy the benefits every single day, regardless of where you are.

You won’t get that kind of rewards program out of a gym membership, I don’t care how generous their terms are.

So get up! Read that CBT lit you got in the doctors office. Call the therapist you’ve been holding back from. Book a fresh round of appointments and be honest about the meds. Go for that walk in the greenery. Listen to music that makes you feel. And think. Think about what’s happening. Give yourself the time and permission to examine your environment, to study every piece of stimulus.

And then, think about what you’re thinking about! Notice the changes in mood for what they are, and decide if the stimulus is causing it or if it comes from within. Use neuroplasticity to make mental workouts an automatic habit. Build the strength you need in your head to live life on your terms.

Make it part of your brain.