Emotions are real. You can feel them, see how they change things, hear them alter your voice.
Their existence is not a matter of question – it is fact. But they come with some big fucking caveats.
- NOBODY ELSE CAN FEEL THEM – all they can see is someone moving in response to stimuli they cannot sense
- YOUR FEELINGS ARE VALID – with Bipolar (and other mental health issues) there is no point in judging the merit of an emotion. It is what it is, and examining it for validity will not resolve its intensity. Yes, you feel what you feel for a reason – that reason is chemicals in your brain doing a weird dance.
- YOU CANNOT CONTROL THEM – mindfulness practices may help you identify what you are feeling. This is good. But they cannot give you control over your emotions. Nothing can. But this doesn’t mean you don’t have a choice
- YOU CAN CONTROL YOUR REACTIONS – you may have no control over what you’re feeling, or why you are feeling it, but you can control how you react.
THIS IS SUPER TOUGH – because you are up against forces that literally part of you, and that no one else can see.Just like someone wear a VR headset, the people around you cannot experience what the wearer sees and hears – they can only observe the wearer’s reactions.
SO BE KIND TO YOURSELF – because the truth is that control is not always possible, and almost never desirable. You can’t take the headset off, but you can learn that this is your own reality. So be nice to yourself when you fall, and give yourself the space to fix things when you need it.